dk323 | Merlin fic: Hope whispers and I will follow (1/2)

Title: Hope whispers and I will follow (1/2)
Author: dk323
Rating: PG
Characters/Pairings: Merlin/Morgana, Merlin/Arthur (pre-slash)
Spoilers: 2x12 – altered version of events
Disclaimer: The show Merlin is property of the BBC. No money being made.
Part 1 Summary: Merlin doesn’t poison Morgana. The two of them confide in each other, but in the end, Morgause has the last word.
Author’s Notes: I know I’m not the first attempting to rectify the events of 2x12, but this is my take on what would have happened if certain things had happened – leaving the end result to be much different. Part 2 will be up later this weekend.

~ * ~

“Merlin!”

Upon hearing Morgana's warning shout, Merlin quickly turned away from the window where he had just sighted the cart.

One of the black knights was coming at him.

Without a sword, he tried his best to avoid the knight’s sword by physically moving out of the way. Forgetting Morgana’s presence momentarily, Merlin acted instinctively. His strength lay in wielding his magic and so he drew his hand forward and shouted a spell to throw the offending knight away from him. A temporary solution, but effective for now.

And then he realized that Morgana was there – her eyes wide in shock at what she had just seen.

Merlin barely gave himself time to think about what had just revealed to Morgana. Instead, he reached out his hand to her.

“Come on, we have to get back.”

She did not take his hand.

She felt betrayed that he had lied to her. That he hadn’t told her the truth about himself after she confided her secret to him. Morgana had entrusted him with the fact of her magic – the very thing that could be the death of her if she were found out.

And yet, Merlin couldn’t extend the same courtesy to her? The same level of trust?

“Merlin, you have magic…” she uttered, part disbelief, part frustrated at finding out now when Merlin could have, should have told her before.

He nodded solemnly, confirming what she had just witnessed.

“You’re like me?”

He nodded again. “I’m sorry. I’m truly sorry, Morgana. I know I shouldn’t have kept this from you. If there is anything I can do--”

“But – why? After what I told you in confidence? Why couldn’t you trust me, Merlin?”

Merlin sighed and led them into a room – away from the hallway where the knights could attack at any moment.

He closed the door and leaned against it. Morgana stood in front of him, a questioning, expectant look in her eyes.

She wanted to understand.

Merlin looked directly at her and began in earnest to explain his actions. “I wanted to tell you. You don’t know how much… but we’re in Camelot. It’s not safe for either of us here. It hasn’t been easy keeping my magic a secret like this – something that is so much a part of me. I was born with magic, Morgana. I’ve had magic before I even knew what it was. It is a part of me I can not change--”

Morgana held up her hand. “You do not need to explain to me. While I had hoped you could trust me, I understand the fear you felt. When the Witchfinder came to Camelot, I was never more frightened than I was then,” she confided to him.

She placed her hand over his cheek, Merlin leaning into the touch. His eyes fluttered closed briefly before he opened them and Morgana saw blue shift to gold before her eyes. Not a moment later, his eyes were their usual expressive blue once again.

“I didn’t know who to trust. It’s just so hard. I’m sorry, so sorry,” Merlin whispered the last words.

And then he fell to the ground, covering his face with his hands.

“Merlin? Oh, Merlin,” she murmured as she kneeled down beside him.

She put her arms around him, hugging him. “What is it, Merlin?” Morgana inquired gently when he didn’t answer her after a few moments.

He looked up at her. “I know the source of the sickness. I have to eliminate it.”

“Well, that’s good,” she said. But at the sad look on Merlin’s face, she took back her words.

Merlin moved away from her and he sighed. He could not look at her. His eyes were cast down to the ground.

“It is you, Morgana. You’re the one who is keeping this sickness going. That is why you are left unaffected,” There was a hint of accusation in his tone, but Merlin knew in his heart that the blame did not lay on her. Even after Morgana’s questionable actions that defied Uther as of late, Merlin would not allow himself to believe that what had presently fallen upon Camelot was her doing.

“But you must know I am not doing this on purpose!” Morgana defended herself in earnest.

He shifted his eyes away from her piercing gaze. “It is the only option I have. I have to kill you for the sake of Camelot. If Arthur continues to fight the knights of Medir in his feverish state, he won’t last long.”

“I know,” she said quietly in grim acceptance. Then Morgana took his hand in hers, trying to catch his eye. He stared down at the hand joined with his own and then, hesitantly, Merlin looked up and uncertain blue met determined green. Upon establishing eye contact, Morgana spoke, “Look, Merlin. I need to tell you something – I think Morgause is to blame. That’s why I went after you after Arthur sent you away to find the cart. She is behind this, Merlin. Morgause sought me out the evening before this sickness started and I met with her. I’m sure that she did something to me because I woke up the next morning, disoriented and confused. That may be why I am left untouched by the spell. If we corner her, talk to her, Merlin – maybe we could convince her to lift the spell.”

Merlin closed his eyes and rubbed his face with his hands. A – preemptive, he thought – sigh of relief escaped him. He desperately hoped that Morgana’s plan would succeed.

Because the other option was too terrible to contemplate.

They headed back to Arthur. The prince had been understandably upset that the two had taken so long – what if the knights had gotten the best of you? What possessed the both of you to take up so much time while the castle is under attack and, particularly important, almost defenseless! He had said -- worry clearly lacing his words.

Once Arthur had settled down, Merlin and Morgana told them about Morgause and how she was the key to stopping the sickness.

The two decided not to tell Arthur about the second, less desirable option. Merlin and Morgana resolved that it would do no good to concern Arthur any further. They hoped that it would never have to come to that. Somehow, not confiding this to the prince allowed them to pretend such a situation would never come to pass. They would do everything they could to prevent the worst from having to occur.

~ * ~

Merlin and Morgana confronted Morgause in the throne room while Arthur handled the knights outside of the room. Merlin hated to do such a thing – leave Arthur to fight the knights in his weakened state, but the prince had been adamant.

They had moved Uther into the throne room in their continued quest to protect the king – or more like Arthur’s mission since both Merlin and Morgana didn’t have the warmest feelings for the king. So someone needed to keep the knights from entering the room and that fell to Arthur, a duty that he could not be dissuaded from.

Unfortunately, Morgause could not be easily persuaded to lift the spell.

“You told me that you were with me!” Morgause cried furiously. She was directing her words at Morgana.

Merlin stood next to Morgana and he kept silent – knowing full well that the conflict was between Morgana and Morgause.

Morgana advanced on her, pointing a finger in accusation. “You didn’t tell me that you were planning to do this. I didn’t agree to Camelot falling in this way! How dare you come here and say I would support such a thing!”

“You still gave me your word,” Morgause said firmly. “Are you going back on what you swore to me?”

“What ever I told you was based on your manipulation! I demand that you end the spell causing the sickness and driving the knights.”

Morgause shrugged. “I do not understand what has led to your change of heart, but you have given me no incentive to lift the spell.”

“This is wrong, Morgause! This must end,” she said fiercely, her green eyes dark and blazing.

But Morgause said simply, “I desire the downfall of Camelot, of Uther – to lift the spell would be adverse to what I want.”

Merlin spoke up then, taking Morgana’s hand in his in a show of unity.

He nodded at Morgause. “You will end the spell and we will give you what you want in return.”

Morgana stared in shock at him. “Merlin, no! We don’t know what she’ll do!”

Morgause looked to be pondering the offer. She looked at each of them in turn and then said softly to Morgana, velvet poison in her words. “For love, Morgana?”

Morgana didn’t say a word in reply, though she tightened her hold on Merlin’s hand, a steely look in her eyes.

“Very well,” Morgause nodded. “I will lift the spell and then I will get something in return.”

Morgana eyed her in suspicion. “Which is what?”

She shook her head. “That is not the way I negotiate. You should be grateful, Morgana, that I am lifting the spell at all. Do not ask for more than you deserve.”

Merlin leaned toward Morgana and he whispered in her ear. “This is what we wanted. The alternative is unthinkable. This is the best choice – the only choice we have, Morgana.”

Morgana sighed. Merlin was right.

And so they allowed Morgause to lift the spell.

~ * ~

Arthur rushed into the throne room after discovering that all the knights had fallen – signifying that the spell was over.

“Is my father all right?” He urgently asked upon entering, shutting the door behind him.

No one gave him an answer.

What he saw before him made his blood run cold.

Morgause was gone, he could see that, but Morgana was on the floor and Merlin’s head was cradled in her lap. Merlin wasn’t moving.

He strode over to her, a terrifying thought gnawing at his gut.

“Morgana?” He questioned, sitting down beside her and Merlin’s prone body.

She continued to look down at Merlin and she stroked his hair in an eerily calm gesture.

“It was Morgause… she lifted the spell, but Merlin paid the price,” she explained softly, still not looking at Arthur. Morgana took a deep breath and now, directing a piercing gaze at him, she said solemnly, “He’s dead, Arthur.”

~ * ~

Part 2

Merlin fic: Hope whispers and I will follow (1/2)

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